[^] My work desk and my sweet dual monitors.
[^] So few wires under my desk, a rare sight indeed!
There needs to be more productive work here. I'm idling again. If only I had more engaging reading material, but no, all I have is a camera manual. ::facefaults:: Time to ramble some, then!
This morning, I was thinking about what I'm doing with my life. All my life I've always wanted to be a teacher. An elementary teacher, specifically, and I've been mentally and emotionally training myself to deal with children my entire life thus far. (Is there such a thing as physically training oneself to teach children, if I'm not aiming for physical education?) Then when I was looking through teaching credential programs, I thought that I might want to teach middle/high school instead, to focus on one subject rather than know a little about everything, which I'm weak at. (Bonnie's my opposite there, she's such a Renaissance woman, sigh. Too bad she can't stand children.) I teach better when concentrating on one subject, but then I think about how much I like little kids. ::sighs:: And then I look at myself now and ask, what on earth am I doing? I'm working at a bike shop? Granted that I'm doing computer work, which I love, but what am I doing at a bike shop instead of working at a school? Something doesn't make sense. While I have taken most of the necessary steps for the teaching credential program, I haven't actually applied. Why? My home situation is keeping me from it. My mind is too constrained and my motions monitored to the point I can't relax, and that would be detrimental to my studies. I don't want to go to school and get my credentials mindlessly, I want to absorb everything so I can be a good teacher. This isn't just about subject material, this is about preparing our young to go out into the world and make a place for themselves. I would not trust myself to teach children anything if I do not know how to instruct them in life. It makes me really want to go back to San Gabriel Academy Elementary to teach, because I think having a Christian education is beneficial to teaching about about life in general and not just mathematics or history. Of course, not everyone is a Christian, but given that I am, I think it would nice for me to go back there. Besides, I miss that school. I still remember playing Oregon Trail with Nozomi when the computer lab was still new ::gasp:: and trying to button mash through it... Oh man, we were so bad at it. Back in those days when she was trigger happy and always whacking me to shoot the rabbits and squirrels while I sat around waiting for the buffalo so I wouldn't waste ammo, and the numerous times some family member or the entire family died while crossing some river. ::laughs:: And now my Nozomi is getting married! I'm so happy for her, and thinking about those days gone by makes me want to cry. She's all grown up and engaged, in the process of getting her masters in psychology at USC, and a beautiful
Tonight, I'm going to go home and search up the application process for teaching credentials for next year. I know God is calling me to be a teacher someday, as I've known that since I immigrated to the US when my kindergarten teacher, Mrs. Killebrew, bless her heart, welcomed me and made me feel at ease even though I could not speak a word of english. I will never forget the compassion and guidance my teachers showed me, and I always knew that was what I wanted to do in my life.
In conclusion, how does one know what lies in store for them in the future? Do we remain passive and see what comes to us, or do we actively seek out our interests and test ourselves? Obviously, I would go for the latter, but I'm also blessed to have known my calling from so early on. For those out there who are unsure of what lies ahead, keep looking! Look inward to understand yourself, look outward for inspiration and motivation, and try whatever strikes your fancy (as long as they are well within reason, of course). Try to love what you do, and if that doesn't work out, try something else! Ah, life is so full of possibilities, it would be a shame to settle for something that makes you miserable.
Now for today's Thankful Three! Yay!
Wednesday Thankful Three
01) Cloud 9. I'm on it, thank you! ::giggles::
02) The wonderful emotion called happiness. It's nice to be reacquainted.
03) The drinking water dispenser at work. I have endless tea->water everyday.
Maybe I shouldn't drink so much water. I'm just glad we have a clean bathroom to use.
Oh and don't think I forgot, today is Trunks' birthday. ♥♥♥
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